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| My facebook doesn't work so I'm seeing if this will magically post to facebook anyway. | | |
| What is with the all or nothing mentality?
Americans in particular seem to be obsessed with success and the illusion of perfection. We put so much pressure on ourselves to do things correctly and on the first try. I was in a class with a fellow analyst a few weeks back. We were having what I thought to be a casual conversation about education. I let him know that I was only a couple of classes away from my associate's degree but that I hate math so it might take me a while. He replied with: "Good. I have a few classes left but I will beat you to your degree. I like it when people have less classes to take to get their degrees because I'll finish first and then I'll win." I told him I didn't think life was a race. It's great to be accomplished and everything, but when the goal is just to "win" or be better than everybody else, I think it's time to shift your focus a bit. To that other analyst, it was all or nothing. He either beat everybody out at everything he did or he was a failure.
We can only live one day at a time. How many times have you thought to yourself, "I should really start doing this or that but I only have a little bit of time or money to devote to it. Besides, I might fail." If you really want to do something and you can only put a little bit of time or effort into it at the moment, that is much better than doing nothing.
Exercise is a good example. I used to only exercise once in a while because I didn't think I would be able to devote every day to exercise. I ended up failing my PT test for the Air Force. I had mandated exercise five days a week. I went to a class for one hour five days a week. When I went to school for four weeks I only exercised about half an hour five days a week. I went from failing my PT test to getting a 95%! Oftentimes the steps in the right direction are small and fairly simple Make a couple of phone calls you've been putting off. Apply for a program or class you're interested in. Set aside half an hour a day to do something you know will benefit you. I know when I did, it felt like I had a whole new lease on life. Don't let the all or nothing mentality get the best of you.
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| I love it when my boss is out of the office. It makes me feel like a little kid. I remember the rare occasions my parents would let me have the house to myself when I was in junior high or high school. I would carefully choose my activities. I would watch tv to my heart's content. I would eat ice cream. I would go to the library and read magazines for hours or use the internet. I would write stories. It was great. Now I have those brief moments when my boss is at lunch, or the super rare and special moments when he takes vacation for a couple of days. It's not that he's not a good boss. I have just found I work a lot better when supervision is not present. Maybe one day I'll have my own office instead of a giant room with six desks in it. In the meantime I wonder if anybody would mind if I brought in my own partition? Or some bricks and mortar? Ha. | | |
| I think my brain needs to be reprogrammed. I don't mean that in a mad scientist sort of way, like I need to be sedated and sliced open and have a machine wipe out my brain and reprogram it. . .although that would be pretty amazing. What I really mean is I don't really like the way I think right now. I've become pretty negative and some of my thought patterns are making me miserable. I don't believe there is necessarily one "right" way of thinking, but I can point out some potentially damaging thought patterns:
1.) "If I had __________I would be happier." Material possessions can only get you so far. There are plenty of things I want. That blank could even be filled in with the word "money". When I get the thing that I think is going to make me happy, I realize there is something else that I want and my desire for things will never be satisfied.
2.) "If he/she would do __________I would be happier." You cannot make other people change, no matter how hard you try. It is not worth your time or energy.
3.)"I am a failure and I could be doing so much more with my life right now." While it's true everybody can use some improvement, it is so much more beneficial to focus on successes, no matter how little they are. Thinking you are a failure is just going to make you act like more of a failure.
4.)"Why can't my life be more like ______'s life?" Your life is your own. You shouldn't harbor unhealthy jealousy of your peers. So what if they seem to have more friends, better jobs, and more glamorous things to do on the weekend?
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| Well it's been a while but I feel like making an entry today. I think I've spent a large part of the last ten months sitting around doing nothing. I couldn't help but notice one of the last blogs I made, dated in January 2010, mentioned my desire to get away from the TV and internet. I don't know if that is the answer. When I really sit and think about it, many "downtime" activities, whether they use an advanced technology or not, produce similar results. You can read things in books or read things on the internet. Either way you are expanding your mind. You can type something out on facebook or you can write a letter to a friend. Either way you are reaching out to people. You can watch TV and discuss the social issues that arise in popular shows, or you can conjure the situations out of thin air or get them from a book. Why do I feel like spending time on the internet and watching television is a waste? I think most of my feelings come from my parents, who always encouraged me to go out and experience life instead of sitting around on the internet or television. For some reason it is so much more rewarding to call a friend up and see them in person than it is to text them or leave them a facebook message. Even though Wii fit can supposedly provide adequate exercise, walking outside on a crisp fall day feels so much better. Well I guess I can't really say that because I've never played Wii fit, but can Wii fit show you the beauty of a fall day, with the beautiful colors on the trees when the lighting is just so? I used to love going for walks at night with my mother. I loved the glow of the street lights and the way every step in the darkness felt like a new opportunity for adventure. A chance encounter with a neighbor made me feel connected to the universe. Walking to the library on my own just because I wanted to made gave me a sense of purpose. Ever since I started dating my husband seriously, I haven't really allowed myself to go somewhere "just because." I think I need to join a choir or get a bike. Why do I have the feeling I'll look back on this in five months and be disappointed that nothing has changed? | | |
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